Archive for the ‘Travels’ category

Betcha I Can Tell Ya Where Ya Got Dem Shoes! (In Da Mud!) — Jazz Fest Edition

May 6th, 2013

While the first two days of Jazz Fest went more or less as expected, that first Sunday showed signs of what was to come. A cold front and thunderstorms for days saturated the Fairgrounds, turning Week 2 into MudFest/ ColdFest/ HorseshitSmellFest. It called for correct footwear, unprecedented layers of clothing, and the willingness to breathe through your mouth. We turn our attention now to the former requirement, showing all the ways that thousands of Festing feet navigated the slick, smelly, deep mud.
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Tons of Festers chose to shed footwear altogether and enjoy the satisfying squish of mud between their toes. This could result in one of two outcomes: a nice nourishing mudbath, like a filthy pedicure, or — for those with open wounds on their feet — a raging staph infection.

Many of those who chose to press on with their regular Fest footwear ended up either sacrificing their flip-flops to deep mud, or became the reluctant owners of a new pair of ruined shoes.


There were those who took the more utilitarian approach borrowed from our local seafood industry and our friends from Across The Pond, for whom festivals in the mud are de rigeur.
We saw many pairs of Cajun Reeboks …

… and Hunter Wellingtons.

Ruined moccasins to the left, Hunters to the right.

Here we have the preppy utilitarian look — lace-up duck boots.

Fun rain boots abounded, with a splash of color or design.
Some wore them with tall socks.

…Some were happy and bright …

… and some were matchy-matchy.

Others were fabulous and artistic.

Rubber boots plus pants equaled the most covered-up Jazz Fest we’ve seen in a while.

Lots of female Festers were sporting the cute cowgirl look. The advantage to these were that the 2-inch heel could be used to spike oneself into the mud for added stability.

With or without Apple Bottom jeans, boots with the fur turned up … fine, as long as the furry part didn’t touch the mud.

Here we have a Very Bad Decision: Uggs. They became massive mud sponges.

Fleur-de-lis were a popular motif out on the Fairgrounds, natch, cher!


Some people showed up in “barefoot” sports shoes with toes.

There were also lots of Crocs, not pictured here as they are offensive to the eye. Here is the most attractive version of Crocs: still fugly.

And here is the pair worn by yours truly: the last rubber boots in all of New Orleans on that second Friday of Jazz Fest, procured by a frantic 10:01 a.m. phone call to Fleurty Girl, who confirmed their French Quarter shop had one pair left, and it happened to be in my size and HEY they were super cute too.

So this story has a happy ending (unless you wore Uggs or are now in the hospital, looking up “cellulitis” on WebMD).
The moral? Wear your rubbers, baby.

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Hola NOLA!

January 4th, 2013

I haven’t been blogging from the road recently, as I’ve settled down for a little bit in one of my favorite places on Earth, the city of New Orleans. It occurs to me that I should treat my adopted home town as any other place I love, and take a zillion pictures and write stories about it. New Orleans is the birthplace of a million stories and those will come, (oh … they will come) but for now here are some photos I’ve snapped in and around New Orleans in the past couple months.

Feel free to follow me on Instagram, y’all: I’m @thefabulouseileen.

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Some Love for Africa

December 6th, 2012

In my last blog entry, I deviated from my standard oh hey, go explore the world y’all typical blog post to make a personal plea on behalf of a friend living on the border of Rwanda and the Democratic Republic of the Congo. In recent weeks, well-financed rebel forces have occupied the DRC’s border city of Goma, bringing violence and a humanitarian crisis to the civilians who live there. People are being killed and wounded. Many who are already living in poverty, or close to it, have been prevented from making a living and their families are going hungry. Refugee camps are overflowing.

I originally asked for donations to help my friend Innocent Twagirumukiza, an eco-tourism guide who made it possible for me and my friends to go on an unbelievable gorilla trekking adventure in 2010 in the DRC.

The response was far more than I had anticipated and I was able to send hundreds of dollars from donors in the U.S. and Canada. In turn, Innocent was able not only to bring his own family to safety (the original push for the aid) but to return to Goma to help people in crisis there.

Here is an email that I received from him today, plus pictures that he took of his first visit to a struggling village. He brought them standard survival supplies that are distributed in refugee camps, plus pens and pencils so that schoolchildren could continue to learn throughout the crisis.

As long as this crisis is ongoing, I will be accepting more funds to help Innocent do the important work that he is doing. If you’d like to contribute, you can send money to my PayPal account at loharrist@yahoo.com and I will provide you with proof of receipt and transfer to Innocent, plus any follow-up communications from him. Please mark any donations as “aid to Africa” or something similar.

Here is Innocent’s email and photos, showing what he has done with a portion of the funding so far. Innocent himself is shown in the last photo, in the khaki vest holding a child.


It’s a great pleasure to me that I was able to visit Families who
faced the terrible situation in last week when the M23 rebels attacked
the town of Goma.

The first time I received your help I tried to use it to help my
family and my friends, tour guides in DRC.

Last Monday I went to Goma and around to see if some people are in
need of help. I found that many people are suffering from hunger and
sickness. 2 weeks, no pure water and electricity and no business at all
the the city of Goma.

Even people who are in refugees camps don’t have access to aids given
by ONGs
(organisation non gouvernementale, or non-government
organizations) and many organisations that have the responsibility to help
them say that they can’t reach Goma because the Goma airport and the
ferry on Lake Kivu are closed.

During my visit I had emotion and I said that I can share with them
the donation you sent. Of course I can’t replace those ONGs, but I tried
to find the more vulnerable people.

For Today, I am very happy that thanks to your great support, I was
able to visit people in Munigi village. which is located 5km from
Goma town on the way to Virunga National Park. It is the place where
the last eruption of 2002 started from forward to the airport and
Goma.

This village is build on lava rocks, no agriculture and people there
don’t know which way they will use to survive again, many of them are
refugees also from other areas.

==> Food is the first need to them. that reason why I prepared the :
-Beans = 70Kg
-Rice = 25Kg
-Fufu(USAID) =75Kg
-Cooking Oil = 25L
-Salt: = 20Kg
-Soap( savon)= 5 long pieces to share
-Petrol (for lamp)=10L
-Pen& pencil: One box each for student
-Transport for all cost us: 20$

IN TOTAL THE FOOD COST IS: 297 USD

I was wishing to distribute these food to 10 families so that can help
them in next 4 or 5 days but it wasn’t possible because we saw other
neighboring families in need.

So the expected families will get food which can support them in 2 days and
3 days for those with 1 to 3 children. I can’t know how many people we
met today, so many. you can see the pictures and others will be on
Facebook.

This village is composed by 66 families and each family has at least 3
or 7 children, the local authorithy Moses said.

P.S: I would like to inform you that this morning I also get 100$ to
support this visit. The money came from Ubumwe community center which
is a center for people living wih desabilities in Gisenyi. They told
me that their friends in USA sent them some money to help people and
they want me to use that money for helping people in DRC.

I thank you again, The people in this village asked me to thank you
too. They wish you God’s blessing. It became as a miracle for them, they
was telling me: “we are very happy and suprised to see other people
far from DRC thinking for supporting us, please greet them for us and
tell them that we ask God to bless them.”

I hope that for next time, I can visit some of rangers’ families who
get problems in this fighting. In my next message I will send you a message
from the Chief of tourism and rangers.

Much Love,
Innocent













































“And whoever saves a life, it is considered as if he saved the entire world.” — Talmud

November 21st, 2012

Hello Peeps …

I don’t normally do this, but during this week of Thanksgiving I am personally reaching out to all y’all on behalf of my dear friend, Innocent Twagirumukiza from Gisenyi, Rwanda.

Innocent has a remarkable story too long to tell here, but in a nutshell, he and his immediate family survived the Rwandan genocide of 1994 while the rest of their extended family was killed.

As a result, Innocent has devoted his life to building and promoting eco-tourism in that region of the world. In this way he can help to develop a sustainable economic engine in an area that is otherwise ravaged by corrupt and destructive industries. (Through Green Hills Eco-Tours, Innocent took me and my friends Dani and Serena gorilla trekking in the DR Congo in 2010 … an unforgettable experience.)

Innocent with Serena, me, and Danielle in happier times — Gisenyi, Rwanda, 2010

Currently, that part of the Congo-Rwandan border is on the verge of war as a rebel group (most likely backed by government agencies) is escalating violence in a ploy for control over the area’s mineral riches. No one is spared, including women and children, and a humanitarian crisis is brewing.

Innocent’s livelihood has been put on hold as he and his family are trying to survive in this environment. I am sending money directly to Innocent’s bank account in Rwanda so that he can support his family and attempt to keep them safe during the conflict. If anyone would like to contribute, even just a few dollars – $5? $10? – it goes a very long way in that part of the world — trust me. It will help immeasurably.

All donations can be sent via Paypal to my account, loharrist@yahoo.com, and I will provide receipt of your payment plus confirmation that the funds were sent to Innocent’s personal account with Bank of Kigali.

Innocent has not asked me to do this, but I can tell you that he is eternally grateful for any support he and his family receives from far-away friends in more stable parts of the world.

If you cannot make a contribution, please consider sharing this request on your social networks — and please also give personal thanks this week that you and your family are in a place of safety and peace.

Thank you, thank you, thank you.

Love,
Eileen

30 Things I Love About Lima (And 3 Things I Don’t), Part 3: 21-30

August 3rd, 2012

Previous entry: 30 Things I Love About Lima (And 3 Things I Don’t), Part 2: 11-20

And without further ado, may I present the last (but certainly not least) of my Lima List …

21. Barranco District — It’s the city’s “bohemian center,” where many of Peru’s foremost artists, musicians and writers have lived and worked. Highlights are a kick-ass cathedral, gorgeous library, lots of cool restaurants and bars, a great view of the ocean, and the Puente de los Suspiros. This is the Bridge of Sighs — legend has it that a wealthy man’s daughter stood there every day, watching for her true love, a street sweeper she was not allowed to marry — and from the bridge, you can still hear her forlorn sighs.

Oh yeah, and there’s a Starbucks, too.

Statue of singer Chabuca Granda in Barranco

22. The “Ceviche Roll” at Zen — This sushi bar is among the best in Lima with chic minimalist decor to match the sophisticated simplicity of the sushi and sashimi. My favorite was a Japanese-Peruvian hybrid roll (Japaruvian?) called the Ceviche Roll: a citrusy cured whitefish roll with tons of kick.

23. Magic Water Circuit (Circuito Magico del Agua) — Kids of all ages (and I do mean ALL) can splash around in this circuit of 13 fountains, lit with flashing lights and lasers set to music. Daytime, nighttime — it’s always good. Just watching the show is fun, and so fabulous to be able to give into your desire to jump in and play.

24. Really Good-Looking Men— This is a notable part of the nightlife (and daylife) in Lima.

25. Maracuya — Right right right, this sweet-and-sour passionfruit is not limited to Lima — and it’s really only pulp, so it’s hard to eat as a fruit. But it is truly mouthwatering as a juice or smoothie, and as an ingredient in all sort of cocktail and food recipes — Maracuya Sours, cheesecakes, smoothies, ceviche.

Maracuya Sour!

25. Architecture — Sleek and modern blends in with centuries-old buildings designed from global influences — Spanish, Moorish, Creole, French, Andalusian, Colonial. I’m a sucker for old-meets-new architecture styles, and Lima has a 21st-century skyline that over gorgeously restored classic buildings. These include the Parisian-styled Central Post Office (Casa de Correos y Telegrafos), Colonial-influenced Municipal Palace (Palacio Municipal), and Colonial-styled Torre Tagle Palace (Palacio Torre Tagle, considered one of the most magnificent buildings in South America).

26. Peruvian Pink Salt — This pretty pink salt is harvested from an underground ocean deep in the Andes. It has a flavorful, hearty taste, loud crunch, and high content of trace minerals including iron. It’s tasty and aesthetically pleasing, and said to ward off infections better than regular salt, and to provide health benefits for people with anemia, arthritis, and other maladies. Lima’s not the only place in Peru (or the world, for that matter) to feature pink salt, but probably the city where it’s most likely you’ll find some on the table without having to ask for it.

27. Birds, Birds, Birds — Peru has more bird species than all of North America and Europe combined, and for that reason, Lima is a very birdy city. Around the streets and beaches of Lima you’ll see dozens and dozens of species: beach birds, coastal marsh birds, garden birds, seabirds — loud and colorful and usually squacking.

Pelican!

28. San Isidro — More trendy than Barranco, more sedate than Miraflores, the San Isidro neighborhood has a great balance of fun and scenery, upscale shops, bars, art galleries, beer gardens, and restaurants. It’s the financial center of Lima so is a bit stuffy, but offset by great shopping, dining, and lovely sculptures and fountains dotting the streets.

29. Delfines Hotel and Casino —This could be the only hotel in South America (or, hell, the world) whose main attraction is dolphins frolicking in a big indoor pool. Before any animal activists start to get all huffy: the hotel sponsors a dolphin research center; the critters are kept in pristine conditions, and guests can help caretakers at feeding and play time. You don’t have to stay in the hotel to check out the dolphins, but with all the luxury amenities you’d find at any modern five-star hotel, it’s not a bad idea.

30. Gorgeous Men — Have I mentioned them?

… And Three Things I Don’t (Part Three)

3. Inka Cola — I can just feel the wrath of my Peruvian friends as I dis their beloved national soft drink: they grew up with it, and still drink it today. As a kid I, too, would’ve loved this lurid yellow soda that tastes like bubblegum. But Adult Eileen finds it way too damn sweet. Inka Zero, the diet version, is much more palatable to me, but that shizz ain’t so easy to find, even in Lima.

30 Things I Love About Lima (And 3 Things I Don’t), Part 2: 11-20

May 10th, 2012

Previous entry: 30 Things I Love About Lima (And 3 Things I Don’t), Part 1: 1-10

Well, I got thrown off by the Jazz and Heritage Festival in New Orleans … so now I will continue my list of badass features in and around the city where I hung out prior to arriving in the Big Easy. Here are 10 more things I love about Lima (and one that I don’t) …

11. Ristorante Huaca Pucllana — Some restaurants have fountains, aquariums or lovely artwork for decór, but I bet this is the only restaurant in the world with genuine ruins from the Inca empire as a design feature. Take a date for cocktails on the terrace as you overlook the Huaca Pucllana ruins, looking lovely at night in a romantic warm glow.

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12. Miraflores — This oceanside neighborhood in Lima has upscale shopping, sleek buildings and architecture, and fine dining. Its coast-hugging roadway, Circuita de Playas, has giant, beautiful sculpture fountains on one side, and the shoreline on the other.

13. Cancha — The big fat kernels of corn that grow here are called maiz cancha chulpe and anchor the majority of Peruvian dishes, but when toasted and sprinkled with sea salt, make an excellent bar munchy or mid-afternoon/ late-night snack. You’ll find them sprinkled alongside especially juicy meals to soak up the liquids, but I like them best when served plain and with a cold beer.

14. Hot Men — They live here and visit here.

15. Beaches — Lima is spread out along a scenic stretch of Pacific coastline, and within the city limits are beaches where surfers, sailors, parasailers, and sun worshippers flock. To the south and north of Lima are fun beach towns of all stripes, many of them quite posh. Whether you want to wear flip-flops or Jimmy Choos to dinner, you can find your ideal beach.

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16. Good shopping — Lima has all the imported clothes, perfumes, electronics and other goodies you’d find in any sophisticated world city, plus handcrafted Andean gifts made with Peruvian textiles and materials that cost a fortune elsewhere. There are also traditional marketplaces to go and get get your haggle on. Lima is one of very few cities in all of South America with Apple computer repair and maintenance (I type as I give Buenos Aires the side-eye).

17. Parks and greenery — Sure, lots of cities have parks, and I rank Lima up there with the likes of London and New York for its many well-groomed, well-maintained, well-lit public green spaces. They have outdoor workout stations, amphitheaters and stages, sculptures, fountains, and gardens. I loved Parque Mariscal Castilla, with all the above features, in the San Isidro neighborhood.

18. Outdoor water features — I don’t know if Lima has more waterfalls, fountains and other outdoor water features than most other cities, but they seem to be everywhere, gushing generous cascades of water.

19. Hot Men — I’m not sure if I mentioned this.

20. TipTop Cafe — I can hear the collective groan from the foodies in Lima as I single out this one eatery (an American-style diner and takeout joint) but hear me out. A city can have a wealth of stellar chefs and restaurants — and Lima does — but a truly great culinary city has good cheap takeout that’s not a fast-food chain. Enter TipTop, where Peruvian and American comfort food come together in a greasy love nest of salchipapas and hamburgers and chocolate-dipped ice cream cones. AND AND AND they deliver.

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… And Three Things I Don’t (Part Two)

2. Coffee — Some of the finest coffee beans on the planet grow in the mountains of Perú and are shipped off to pretentious coffee shops the world over, but you’d never know it when you visit. The vast majority of restaurants, cafes and even coffee shops (Starbucks, I am looking at you) serve freeze-dried instant coffee. In most countries this is an affront, but in a country that produces truly great coffee, it is practically a crime.

30 Things I Love About Lima (And 3 Things I Don’t), Part 1: 1-10

April 20th, 2012

1. Amazing Culinary Scene. Perú’s capital city is a booming gastronomic hub with fabulous eateries of all genres. A variety of fresh ripe seasonal ingredients — from nearby jungles, forests, mountains, waterways, and ocean — are used in creative, classic, and clever ways. From cafés serving “peasant food” (comida de campesinos) to Michelin-starred restaurants, it’s possible to get a memorable meal in Lima no matter how many soles you have in your pocket.

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2. Plaza Mayor (Plaza de Armas). Lima’s majestic main plaza boasts the Palacio de Gobierno, the Cathedral of Lima and Archbishop’s Palace, and stately Spanish Colonial buildings housing museums and municipal buildings. Chill on one of about 50 marble benches scattered around the lush fountains, statues, flower beds and lawns.
3. Good-Looking Guys.This is self-explanatory.
4. Pisco Cocktails. Perú’s signature liquor is Pisco, a strong brandy of muscat grapes. The national cocktail is the Pisco Sour, made from limes, beaten egg whites, simple syrup, and bitters (and invented, curiously, by a gringo). As good as a Pisco Sour is, don’t hesitate to try Pisco in other boozily effective forms, such as Pisco and sweet-tart maracuyá juice, chilcano de Pisco (Pisco with ginger ale and lime juice, both shown below), or the innocently lethal Pisco Punch.

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5. The Pisco Sour Trifecta. On that note, cocktail aficionados will want to visit a threesome of bars said to serve the best Pisco Sours in Lima. Go to the swank Hotels Bolivar, Maury, and Country Club Lima to taste the difference between a good Pisco Sour and a great one.
6. Dudo, or “Peruvian Liar Dice,” is a drinking game said to have been invented by the Inca and taught to Spanish conquistadors when they arrived. I have to doubt that, because if so, the Spanish would have been way too wasted to conquer anyone. Whatever its origins, this is a game of bluffing, educated guessing, and reading other players — simple to learn, but difficult to master.
7. Sunsets. Settled as it is on the Pacific, Lima has some damned impressive puestas del sol (at least in the summer months, clear of fog). The sun sinking behind Isla San Lorenzo shoots a zillion colors across the sky and bathes the city in a dreamy glow.

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8. Se Habla Ingles. It seems most of Lima’s population can speak at least some English — not just professionals and scholars, but shop clerks, taxi drivers, and bathroom attendants too. This had a down side for me, as it became tough to improve my Spanish when everyone wanted to practice their English with me.
9. Sauces! From the tongue-blistering salsa de rocoto (hot pepper sauce) to the creamy, tangy salsa de Huancaina, to salsa Criolla (onion-chili relish) … Peruvians know how to dunk and smother their food. My favorite is aji, a popular yellow chili sauce that ranges from mildly to suicidally spicy, and could make an old running shoe taste good.

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10. Attractive Men. … You know what I’m talking about.

    … and 3 Things I Don’t (Part One)

Straight Pisco. With all the raving I just did about Pisco, it’s probably surprising to see this here, but straight-up Pisco, to me, invokes the flavors of nail polish remover with undertones of pesticide. I say this knowing full well that in the past decade Pisco has become more sophisticated, and elegant, and artisanal, and sought after, and bla, bla, blaaaa … I will happily drink Pisco mixed with something else and love it, but leave the shot glasses on the shelf please.

A Dirty Truck is a Happy Truck: Off-Road Adventures in Peru

April 13th, 2012

Here are some snaps from an excellent weekend on the central Peruvian coast with Alta Ruta 4×4, a Lima-based motorsports company that organizes 5-star off-road adventure trips and expeditions around South America.

This excursion involved about 30 badass off-road vehicles driving through the desert from Ica to Playa Barlovento — a remote, wild and gorgeous beach that really can only be accessed with a badass off-road vehicle.

The caravan gathers, and drivers get their trucks ready to abandon pavement for a few days ….

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And off we go on a bouncy, speedy ride — over sandy flats; up, down and through picturesque dunes.

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Whee! Speed limits? What are those?

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We drive about two hours until we get to Playa Barlovento.

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Here, organizers have set up the deluxe camping accommodations that characterize Alta Ruta trips. There is a main tent, outdoor bathrooms, and staffed kitchen, where we will be fed glorious meals throughout the weekend. As per Alta Ruta standards, it is all very swank.

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There is even a massage therapist on hand to work out the knots and kinks that a person can get bumping along in a badass 4×4.

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Everyone unpacks their individual tents and shelters, and gets ready for serious relaxation at a truly unspoiled beach, where there is absolutely no sign of development, and few to no other humans in sight.

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One of Alta Ruta’s sponsors, Can-Am ATV, provided a fierce little Commander 1000 for us to check out during the weekend. A spin around the sand in a zippy dune buggy, driven by a cute boy? DON’T MIND IF I DO.

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This coastal area was home to a ton of wildlife, most notably, several different species of birds …

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(this was one of my favorites, the snowy egret)

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… and here is a baby sea lion and a curious pelican who hung out at the campsite for an entire morning.

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The sunsets are nothing short of astonishing.

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We had plenty of time to jump back into the 4×4 and explore more of the coastline a bit farther south.

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If you are in South America and have a badass off-road vehicle, I urge you to jump in on an Alta Ruta 4×4 trip … it is a great way to experience natural spots that few people get to see.

If you do not have access to a badass vehicle, Alta Ruta can hook you up. For instance, you can combine a stay in this super dreamy oceanfront spa resort, Hotel Paracas, with an Alta Ruta excursion. Both the hotel and Alta Ruta staff (like so many people in and around Lima) are very proficient in English.

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Here is the Alta Ruta 4×4 site translated into English. Besides organizing off-road excursions, the company provides four-wheel-driving and safety classes, and is a race team in the world-famous Dakar Rally, which begins in Lima next year.

… and here is their Facebook photo album of the trip.

¡ARRIBA!

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Dirty trucks are the best.

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A Wild Goose Macaw Chase, Urubamba River, Peru (Part 2)

March 28th, 2012

Previous entry: A Wild Goose Macaw Chase, Urubamba River, Peru (Part 1)

Dropped off at the riverside near Timpia, knowing only that I had to find the jefe of the village and get permission to see the macaws, I headed down a muddy path that led back, back, back. The farther I got from the water, the more apprehensive I became. Finally I came to a long row of small houses, with a wide marshy field in front, then another row of houses.

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Faces turned and gawked at me as I squished past them in the mud. I imagined it wasn’t every day that a soaking wet gringa with a huge backpack wandered into their yard. I asked a few people about the jefe and they told me which house was his. They weren’t overtly rude, but they weren’t exactly what I would call friendly.

The man to whom they directed me was a bit more receptive. He was Tomas, the vice-jefe, and he took me to see the main jefe, Felipe, who lived at the very end of the long row of houses. Neither of them had bones in their noses or any evidence of human sacrifice in their homes: both were pleasant, as were their wives, and their kids were cute. They wore normal clothes and wellingtons, as did most people in this village. For good reason, I thought ruefully as I looked down at my mud-caked shoes and jeans.

I asked Felipe about the macaws and he studied the sky. “There’s been too much rain today. They don’t come when it’s raining,” he said. “And it’s too late. Come back tomorrow, meet me in my office around seven. If conditions are right we can get you a guide.”

If conditions are right. I didn’t press, but thanked him and walked back to the path leading to the boat dock. Tomas accompanied me. “Where are you staying tonight?” he asked, and I told him about the hospedaje at Sabadi. “I think that might be closed,” he said, “but you have a tent, right?” I told him I didn’t, and he gave me a funny look. I know, dude. Bad planning. He was probably used to well-prepared, well-funded avian researchers and considered me the world’s most terrible scientist.

As I waited for a cargo boat to come along and take me downriver, I chatted with the woman who worked at the boat dock booth. She was 31, a widow with three kids. “Your husband died so young,” I observed. “I’m really sorry. Was he sick?”

“No,” she said, indicating the rushing water before us with a tilt of her chin. “The river took him.”

I studied her prematurely lined face. Despite its simplicity, this was a hard life here.

I waited an hour, and finally saw a guy pull up in his own boat. A private boat! When he walked up the riverbank, I asked if he could jet me down the river, to the hospedaje at Sabadi.

“Esta cerrado,” he told me. “Los dueños están de vacaciones.” Tomas had been correct: the place was closed. I felt my heart sink and considered my options, which seemed to be: sleep outside and hope for no rain, which seemed naive; or sleep in the fetal position in the boat dock booth. But then the guy told me about a little guest house back in the village … if I asked permission from the jefe, maybe I could stay there for the night.

Does anything go down around here without that dude’s permission? Another trip back up the long path, back to the houses and the people swiveling and staring, back to Felipe’s house, where his wife told me he wasn’t there — he was in his office. Which was at the other end of the village. Of course.

I was still soaked, and sloshed through the mud thinking the clock was ticking on my ability to stay in these wet clothes and shoes for much longer without losing my mind. If Felipe said no to the guest house, I would crash the boat dock booth and that was that.

I passed Tomas’ house and when I saw him, I told him he was right: the hospedaje was closed after all. He told me I could stay in the guest house, and walked me there. It was a tiny cabin, one room really, with a small porch and an outhouse and outdoor sink. But that was great by me: I just wanted to change my clothes and crash. The sun was sinking fast and Tomas showed me the room: empty except for two cots with thin mattresses. He grabbed a broom and swept a couple of wrappers and dust bunnies hurriedly out the door, pulled a thick wool blanket over one of the mattresses, switched on an overhead light (I hadn’t expected that) and declared me all set up for the night.

As I stood outside washing up and brushing my teeth, a loud crackling noise startled me: it was an ancient-sounding PA system and a man’s voice reading announcements. I could see a large building across the field and a speaker on top of a tall pole: this must be Felipe and that was probably his office. It all seemed to me more like a military camp than a typical community.

I lay on the mattress on top of my sleeping bag — it was way too hot to get inside — and played Angry Birds on my iPad. It was only 8 p.m., but I was exhausted and kept dozing off in mid-game, flinging birds in all directions. As I got up to switch off the light, I noticed a few gaps in the walls and floor, and spent a few minutes stuffing my wet clothes into them. Didn’t want to be surprised by spiders in the night. I flicked off the light and lay back down, nodding off almost immediately.

A scratching noise woke me before long, and I looked at the window where it came from. Crawling along the screen, in silhouette from the light of a neighbor’s house, was a big rat.

I gave a sharp inhale and sat up, noting he was outside and glad I had heavy screens keeping him there. I didn’t find it easy to fall back asleep, though, and a few minutes later, as I lay on my sleeping bag trying to relax enough to doze off again, movement caught my eye. In the feeble light I saw the rat again, on the windowsill … then he darted down the sill and along a shelf. Inside the room.

“Oh, hell no.” I jumped out of bed, ran to flick on the light switch, and grabbed the broom that Tomas had used. Where had he gone? Something thumped overhead and I looked up to see a long gray tail disappear into a gap in the ceiling slats. Then I heard scuttling and squealing above me, in the space between the ceiling and roof. The rat had friends, and they all lived right over my head.

I have had my sleep rudely disrupted by jungle rats before, in Laos — so one would think this situation was no big deal. But that incident had less of a desensitizing effect on me, and more of a traumatizing one. I couldn’t sleep with rats around, and I knew they’d be curious about the new smells I’d brought. There was nowhere to go except the porch, and rats were out there too. At least in here I was off the ground and protected from the rain. A quick appraisal of the situation revealed several holes in the ceiling and no way to plug them.

The rats had appeared only after I’d shut off the light. So I kept it on, and that worked — for a couple hours. Then the light turned off and there in the darkness, I realized this village had electricity available during certain hours only. All I could do now was burrow deep into my sleeping bag, and sleep with the broom. A few times I heard rats scuttling around, and I hollered obscenities at them which (I told myself) scared them into retreat. A couple times I banged the broom against the wall or floor, but mostly I stayed enclosed. Until I heard the unmistakeable sound of something rustling the heavy plastic bag full of my toiletries. I popped out of my sweaty sleeping bag and flicked my iPad cover open. Its screen illuminated a rat on the shelf opposite me, his eyes glowing in the light. That one scurried off. I turned the light to my toiletries bag — no rat there — but he was probably inside the bag.

It was a lululemon athletica shopping bag, imprinted with New Agey feel-good platitudes such as, “The conscious brain can only hold one thought at a time. Choose a positive thought!” As I stood whacking the bag with a broom handle to flush out the rat, I vaguely wondered whether the lululemon people ever imagined their bag in this type of situation, or whether they had a relaxation mantra strong enough to release my future angst over this. I didn’t see the rat scuttle away, and feared I had killed him, rather than just scare him out of the bag and away from me. I worried about my hair and skin products tainted with dead-rat germs, imagining a fat gray body cooling and stiffening in a fragrant grave of Clarins and Kiehl’s. When I finally fell back into a fitful sleep, I dreamed I found three big, dazed, vengeful rats in the lululemon bag the next day.

But the following morning, there was no rat in the bag, just a broken bottle of moisturizer. To my surprise, the rats had not chewed through my food bag that held fruit, granola bars, and chocolate. Stupid rodents. I got dressed and washed up at the outside sink, and headed off to find Felipe.

But he didn’t have anything good to tell me. Pointing at big dark storm clouds to the north, where the cliffs were, he said there was no chance the macaws would be there. “They don’t go there when it rains,” he explained. I would’ve thought the rain would make the clay all nice and chewy for them, but then again, my logic had failed me for pretty much this entire trip. “Can you stay a few days?” he asked. “Three, four days from now, maybe it won’t be so rainy; maybe they’ll be there.”

I didn’t have enough supplies for a few more days, and couldn’t even consider spending another night in Rat Cabin. I thanked him for all his help and left the village, stopping by Tomas’ house to thank him too. “Come back in May!” he said brightly. “It won’t be so rainy then.”

A two-hour boat trip followed, this time through no rain, so I could get some better shots of the waterfalls along the river.

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Then, a two-hour ride to Ivochote over the muddy mountain road on the back of a motorbike, and a ten-hour bus journey (also on the muddy road) brought me back to Quillabamba. It gave me a lot of time for thinking, and during that time I reconsidered my stance on tour groups. I will admit, they are a good idea in certain situations. As is a tent, and better rain gear, and maybe rat repellant. I have to find out if that exists. If not, I could invent it and cover the box with quotes like “Stay positive, breathe deeply, and avoid rats!” and make a fortune.

A Wild Goose Macaw Chase, Urubamba River, Peru (Part 1)

March 26th, 2012

Years ago, I read a National Geographic feature about clay cliffs in the Amazon with minerals ideal for the diet of macaws. Thousands of the massive parrots gather at these cliffs and stuff themselves silly on the clay. So while in Cusco, I was stoked to see a tour company advertising trips to the “Parrot Cliffs.” A quick Internet search revealed the Cusco region indeed had a few macaw cliffs.

I wanted to go, but not with a tour. Most inclusive tours have jacked-up prices for all the elements — transportation, lodging, food — that I can arrange myself at a fraction of the cost. When using a tour company, what one pays for is a guide and the convenience of having someone else plan everything. Which is great if you want it, unnecessary if you don’t. I figured, if clay macaw cliffs were around, I could get there on my own. Easy-peasy!

The closest ones to Cusco were in a place called Timpia, near a village of the same name that didn’t appear on any maps, deep in the jungle on the Urubamba River. The scant information on the Internet pronounced Timpia the most beautiful of Peru’s clay cliffs. Sold!

The first leg involved a lovely, scenic six-hour trip through the mountains and cloud forest to the city of Quillabamba.

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I suppose the drive wouldn’t be nearly as enjoyable to people afraid of heights, or who get carsick on mountain switchbacks, or freak out on roads with no guardrails and sheer drops mere inches from the vehicle (I will admit that some of those razor’s-edge plunges did make me nervous).

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But, for the most part, I liked the drive. A cloud forest is different than simply fog; the clouds snake through the trees in heavy languid puffs, creating an alien, otherworldly effect. You really feel as though you are in sky-realm, not of the earth anymore.

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Upon arrival in Quillabamba, I went to one of its larger hotels for information about Timpia’s clay cliffs. I watched the staff’s expressions change from blank to confused as I realized they had no idea what I was talking about. Wasn’t this stuff famous? It turned out the clay cliffs were not nearly as well-known as I’d thought. With no outside information, I decided to get as close as I could to Timpia and then wing it. This was an ambitious (read: very dumb) plan, but the only way I could think of.

A town upriver from Timpia, called Ivochote, was the largest in the region. A night in Ivochote, some information from the locals about the bird cliffs of Timpia, a nice hired guide for the day, and I’d be all set.

That leg of the trip involved a bouncy local bus for many hours along a mud road. Somehow, in this land of anything goes on a bus, I wound up riding with a little brown mutt named Candy on my lap. She belonged to a family on the bus, whose adult laps were all occupied by kids.

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The dog turned out to be good snuggly company on a long, uncertain, and uncomfortable ride, marked by bus speakers blasting tinny mournful Spanish love songs on an endless loop, and a series of traveling salesmen standing in the bus aisle, pitching their products. I felt bad for those guys — it couldn’t be an easy gig — but tuned them out as best as I could.

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We left at 5 p.m. Sometime around 1 a.m. the bus stopped in Ivochote. At the time, I was either sleeping, or they were vague in announcing the stop (likely a combination of the two) because by the time I learned we passed it, we’d passed it hours ago. But the bus was traveling on the only road in the area, still toward Timpia. It wasn’t an ideal situation, but not a disaster either.

We got stuck in the mud a few times and needed a tire change, and around 9 a.m. arrived at literally the end of the road: Puerto Mainiqui, a tiny riverside village. The other villages upriver, including Timpia, were only accessible by boat. I met three local women and asked if I could take a boat to Timpia. They said yes and seemed amused at my interest in the birds — loros, they called them.

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Once I got into the village and started asking around, though, I discovered that: a) no one seemed to know exactly where or what these clay cliffs were, and b) hardly anyone owned a boat. I’d been counting on a situation where a fisherman or some other guy with a boat would be willing to ferry a tourist for some extra money — I’d run into that scenario before, and thought it universal. So it was a bit shocking for me to learn that in a river town like this, no one had private boats for hire. I would have to hop on a cargo boat.

I was now on their timetable, not mine. The boat wouldn’t leave for hours, and so I spent them in a little cafe, eating a frankly delicious meal of roasted lamb and rice with peppers and onions, drinking coffee, and chatting with the cafe owner and a steady stream of customers. Most were riverboat workers, the others lured by gossip about a foreigner in town (!) a woman traveling by herself (!!). By 3 p.m. — just when the rain that had been falling steadily all day turned into a downpour — it was time to go.

The boat workers wrapped my backpack in a tarp and gave me a plastic poncho to wear over my rain jacket and jeans. I used it to wrap my daypack, which held all my electronics and was therefore more important to keep dry than I was. We passed magnificent cliffs and waterfalls along the river, but the rain kept me from taking too many photos. By the time a giant wave crested the boat’s side and saturated me, the camera was, luckily, tucked in the plastic-wrapped daypack. One of my few good decisions on this trip.

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About two hours in, we pulled up to a steep bank. The boat driver said this was my stop.

“Wait, what? This?” Aside from a tiny cabana — just a booth with a clock and shelf and log book — I saw nothing but trees and mud. “But what I want is on the river, not the village.” I explained the thing about the macaws again, in case the boat driver hadn’t understood me the first million times, and he patiently waited until I was done and said, “Yes, but you need permission to go there. You have to ask permission from the jefe of Timpia.”

Well, this was unexpected. I clambered out and grabbed my backpack. “Ten o’clock tomorrow morning, we pick you up here,” the driver shouted.

“Wait, what? Tomorrow?” I had a sleeping bag but no tent; in my rush out of Cusco, I’d overlooked the now-obvious detail that I might need to spend the night somewhere that didn’t have bed-and-breakfasts. The boat driver assured me there was a hospedaje downriver, in the next village called Sabadi. “After you see the loros, you stay there,” he told me, waving as the boat pulled away.

I felt genuinely nervous, now that I was pretty well stuck here. I needed permission from the jefe, the village leader; how did he decide yes or no? Would I need scientific credentials, or ability to speak the local dialect? What if the jefe said no? What if this was some weird tribe that offered rejected bird-watchers as a sacrifice to the gods? Who was this jefe, anyway? Did he have a bone in his nose? had he overthrown the last jefe in a battle royal to the finish? I walked down the muddy path that led away from the river, with that familiar refrain in my head: how did I get myself into this?

Next entry: A Wild Goose Macaw Chase, Urubamba River, Peru (Part 2)